Thursday, June 11, 2015

an you believe it! I am alive!!!  And how my little ones have grown!!!!!

Madison and Jackson are 3 1/2.  Madison is my sweet little diva and just so independent.  Jackson is well, he is a boy.  My family likes to call him a sour patch kid.  One minute he is so sweet and loving and then the next he is tackling you on the floor.  But he has the biggest heart.

And well, we want number 3.  We feel now the twins are getting older we want that baby.  So, we secretly have been doing a frozen cycle.  With the twins IVF round, we got 5 5day blast that were good quality. We transferred two and froze 3.  On June 3rd we transferred one (yes only one :) ) on that day.

I thought that a frozen cycle after all this time would be so easy but man did it bring all the emotions of the roller coaster back like we were still on that journey.  The shots, the hormones, the schedule, the was just all back.  Friday I have my blood drawn to get my beta numbers but I cheated of course. I am not sure what to make of it.  I got a VERY faint squinter on the First Response but the digital came up pregnant. I am nervous about the faint line but I thought with a digital you have to have at least 50 hcg level.  Hmmmmmm.....what does it all mean!

Sorry tried to put pics and it wouldn't let me. will have to later tonight!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012


hey girls...
I know how hard it is once someone you have been following during your infertility and your own struggles and then read about their love and joy that they have once they get their little miracles. I don't want to loose any followers so I am going to leave this blog to post about any infertility or PCOS discussion but I have a new blog that will follow the growth of my babies. If you are comfortable following this blog, I would love to have you as a follower because I love all, you can find me at http://mnjcoakley.blogspot.jcom/

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Lack of sleep.....

but so worth it. My sweet little ones had their monthly check up and Madison weighs 5 lb 10 oz and Jackson weighs 6lb 11oz. Cant believe they are about the size of a normal newborn. My son was out of preemies about a week ago but my little girl is still so tiny and has been able to still wear her preemies clothes but tonight I put on one of her jumpers and it is too short, she was not even able to straighten her legs. Crazy just how quickly they grow so now she is wearing newborns. It was sad, my little babies are already getting so big.

I am new on this preemie thing but since they were born 2 months early they have a chronological birthday (day they were born) and an adjusted age (based on due date). Per Dr. the adjusted age is used when it comes to development but I feel like my babies are not 2 months behind. I feel they are no different then any other newborn. They are already so alert, starting to hold their head up so well, and etc. I guess I will start noticing the difference a little later but its amazing to watch them start to notice things.

As for the night time, they are still on every 3 hr feeding so I dont get much sleep. I am also breastfeeding both (pumping more then breast because they are not that great at it at this point) but by the time I get them changed and fed, I have about an hour to fall asleep and be back up for the next round. My mom and sister are currently staying with me and helping and between them and my husband they are able to take turns. I however had to be up for each one but occasionally I will sleep through one. Cant wait till they are able to sleep longer then the 2 hours but they are suppose to be around 8lbs before that happens. The way they are gaining weight though it shouldnt be too much longer.

To top off our crazy emotional roller coaster of a year, my fatherinlaw passed away last night after a battle with cancer. My poor husband and his family have lost his sister and now his father. He was blessed with twins this year and he feels God took away and giveth. His sister is greatly missed and his father will be as well. They are both painless in heaven and that is a blessing. Looking forward to 2012, a fresh year with many blessing with our little ones. So happy to know the guardian angles in heaven watching over our little ones. RIP John and Jenny.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Where I have been.....

I am so sorry to just now get an update about what has been going on. For those not aware, I was admitted to the hospital November 1st due to my blood pressure. I was diagnosed with Pre clampsia. Every day was a touch and go situation but on 11/7/11 due to spike in my blood pressure they performed an emergency c-section. The only cure for preeclampsia is delivery. Our little miracles: Madison Lynn at 12:52 PM weighing 3 lb 8oz and Jackson Thomas was born at 12:53 PM weighing 4 lb 9oz. I was put on magnesium drip for 24 hrs to get my blood pressure down and unfortunately this kept me from being able to see my babies till I was off. 26 hours later, I was able to see my babies and learned Madison was a little trooper and only needed a little oxygen and some IV fluids which she was completely off within a few days. Jackson had a little more trouble and did require a c-pap for several days but thanks to prayers he was taken off on 11/10/11 and then was put down to oxygen and after a little over a week he was finally off all of it.

We were able to hold our baby Madison by day 3, she was so tiny. She dropped down to 3lb 2 oz. Sadly it was a while before we were able to hold Jackson but after about a week, finally! They were in closed beds for a while and emotionally that was hard because all you could do was go in and look through glass at your babies. Not much hands on and not much snuggling which I needed.

The biggest obstacle was feeding. Due to being 2 months premature they had not acquired the suck, swallow, breath technique and we just had to work with them and work with them. At the beginning we could barely get them to take 2cc once a day but then after a little over a week they both started eating well.

Madison was the first to have her feeding tube removed and went home a few days later. Jackson feeding tube was removed the next day but he staying longer because he was having heart drops. She came home on Nov 28th and he came home on Dec 2nd. almost 4 weeks in the NICU.

We do not get much sleep. Madison came home under 4lb and Jackson under 5lb so they have to eat every 3 hours around the clock. I am attempting breast feeding so not much sleep in between. We are loving every minute of it and love watching them continue to grow. They have gotten so big since the NICU (well as big as a preemie should be). We just let the Dr this morning and Madison weighed 4 lb 12 oz and is 18 in long. Jackson is 4lb 14 oz and 19 in long. Everything looked good for both. They have started staying awake a little more with feeds and already starting with facial expressions.

Poor babies a few days old....


Sweet tiny babies now....

Monday, October 31, 2011

32 weeks

How Far Along: 32 weeks and 2 days

Dr apt updates: high risk Dr did measurement and growth u/s last week and everything looked great. They are no longer measuring my cervix because at this point it would be safe to deliver. At this point, I now just stay on bedrest and wait for contractions or any other complications then it will be time. If nothing, I am scheduled for 37 weeks.

Size of Baby: Thursday ultrasound Baby A (Madison) measured 3 LB 10 OZ and Baby B (Jackson) measured 4 LB 5 OZ. They both looked good and their fluids are great.

Belly Picture:

They were able to get Jackson's 3D photo a couple of weeks ago and finally was able to get Madisons.....

Weight Gain: still only around 8 lbs of weight gain at this point

Sleep: I have learned that sleeping propped up is more comfortable then laying flat on my side. It has seemed to help get more then an hr at a time.

Milestones: I have made it to 32 weeks which means I can deliver at the hospital I wanted to (if less then 32 weeks I would have to deliver at the other hospital due to NICU)

What I'm Looking Forward to: feeling comfortable again

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Week 30 and 31

How Far Along:  today 31 weeks and 3 days

Size of Baby: babies are getting measured on Thursday

30 weeks
31 weeks

Weight Gain:  8 pounds last week, I have been gaining about 2 pounds a week now

Sleep:  I take naps between getting comfortable and going to pee

Milestones: getting to 34 weeks (last Dr apt my cervix was very thin)

Movement:  movement is all the time and very strong, its such an amazing experience

Food Cravings: milk but I have noticed the last few months my appetite has really picked up

What I'm Looking Forward to: holding my sweet babies

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Bedrest and good news :)

Okay, bedrest is no fun.  It is so boring and my best advise for anyone on it you just have to find stuff to do.  My first project was the bookcase for the nursery.  This was from my Grandma's house who passed away a few years ago. I felt it would be important to be in their room but it was just tan.  So, I got creative.....

When I was told by the Dr that I was on permentant bed rest till the babies are here. I decide I have to find stuff to do. I was originally going to order the letters to put above their crib but instead I bought them and will decorate them.  They are not done yet but will post when I am complete.  I also decided just to do random canvas painting for the nursery.  Here is one I just completed....

Now for the good news.  
***As my last post stated, I had to do the 24 hr urine test for pre clampsia.  I am happy to say I passed although they are still going to watch my blood pressure because it still is high. 

***I also had my gestational diabetes test done the same day, well I PASSED! This was a big milestone for me because with PCOS and being insulin resistance, my Dr didnt expect me to pass.  I am really excited about that.  

***Last, the FFN test I took on Monday came back negative.  

YEAH!  Just felt good for once in the last month to have good news.  Not having to worry about gestational diabetes or pre clampsia is a blessing.  Now hopefully my cervix will stay and Monday I will have more good news.

Monday, October 10, 2011

29 weeks

After being released from the hospital I have had several apt.  The Monday afterwards, Madison's fluids has sustained from the IV fluids and my cervix looked good so they allowed me to go back to work.  Went to work Tuesday through half a day on Thursday when I had my check up at the high risk.  My cervix had made quite the change during this time period and I was officially put on permanent bedrest.  I also had a high blood pressure so I had to complete a 24 hr urine collection over the weekend which sucked.  I couldnt believe at 27 weeks I was already on bedrest but what ever is best for the babies. 

Jason left that weekend to go see his Dad and I took it pretty easy. I will say I did go do a little bit of shopping and found some cute outfits for the babies. Today they wanted to do a FFN to check if I am at risk of labor in the next two weeks. My cervix is a little longer then 1 (cm I think) but when I was contracting, it was less then 1.  Cervix is still close however which is a good sign.  I had to do the sugar test today and I should know the results for pre-clampsia test tomorrow.  So, now just waiting on test results. 

How Far Along: 29 weeks and 1 day  

Size of Baby: last week Jackson weighed 2lb 14 oz and Madison was 2lb 4 oz.....yes she is smaller then him but they said could be margin of error due to her low fluids or its natural for male to be larger then female

Picture:  not one this week

Weight Gain:  about 6 pounds

Sleep: ugh.....I rest but not sleep. I can not get comfortable at all

Milestones: 3rd trimester

Movement:  my belly is constantly jumping and they have started what I think rolling and its noticeable

Symptoms: swelling of the hands, back aches, braxton hicks, and lots of pressure

Food Cravings: nothing particular, my appetite is allot larger now

What I'm Looking Forward to: babies to be here and be healthy :)

Monday, October 3, 2011

28 weeks

Jackson's sweet face, he was the only one wanting to participate this morning during the ultrasound and the nurse surprised me by taking a 3D shot of him. I thought it was so awesome.  Look at those cheeks.

So, have had an eventful last couple of days.  Last post I mentioned the shortening of my cervix and I had an u/s scheduled for Thursday.  (Sept 29)   During the ultrasound they found my cervix had not changed which was good because that means it wasnt actively thinning.  However, when they looked at Madison's fluid they saw that hers was about half of what Jackson's was.  Her bloodflow to umbilical cord was high.  They then decided to monitor me for 30 min and see how her heartrate was.  During the monitoring I had a contraction and her heart rate dropped.  With the combination of her heart rate dropping and her having low fluids, they sent me straight to the hospital where I stayed for 24 hrs.  During that time they had me on IV fluids to see if they would be able to increase her fluids and also had me on a monitor the whole stay to see if her heart dropped during any other contractions.

 They had me so scared though because my OB came in and started discussing c-section procedures with me and NICU and etc.  They made me fast from the time I got there for about 6 hrs incase I had to have the c-section.  It was something I didnt even want to think about at only 28 weeks.  They started me on steroids to help strengthening the babies lungs in case they come early. 

After a night in the hospital on fluids,  her fluid did go up a little bit. Enough they felt okay with sending me home.  This morning had a follow up appointment and her fluids have stayed the same but her umbilical flow looks good.  I go back on Thursday for a growth measurement and hopefully she is growing at the rate she should.  One of the fears of low amniotic fluid is not enough room for the baby to grow.  So, now I just wait. If they are unable to keep her with a steady amount of fluid, I may be spending the rest of my pregnancy in a hospital bed.  I just pray this is no the case. 

Monday, September 26, 2011

Eventful transition to 3rd Trimester

Well, I will do the Dr update first.  Wed, 9/ 21st I started feeling very uncomfortable at work. Shortning of breath and few back to back contractions.  I called my Dr and he said to come in labor and delivery right away. I was scared to death. Didnt know what to think after the apt I had on Monday.  My husband had been home sick, I tried to call him the whole way to the hospital and couldnt reach him.  Finally, a friend of ours was able to wake him up (yes, he will sleep through anything) and he was on his way.  They put the monitor on the babies, both heart beats were strong and steady.  They did the FFN and it was negative. They did find out I had a UTI, gave me medicine and sent me home with rest.

Went to high risk appointment this morning to see if any change from last Monday and my cervix has continued funneling (opening) and now cervix has shortened.  They monitored for 30 minutes to see if I was contracting, luckily I was not. They sent me home with strict bedrest until Thursday. I go back on Thursday and hopefully no change in cervix or if there is change its due to my cervix getting longer again.  Only time will tell. For now, it looks like allot of laying down and soreness (from laying down) is here. Hopefully, this is temp.  I cant imagine having bedrest from here on out but its about the babies and what they need at this point.

How Far Along: 27 weeks and 2 days 

Size of Baby: both weighing over 2 pounds a piece

Picture:  not one this week

Weight Gain: have not weighed yet this week, OB apt on Thursday 

Sleep: still not getting much, the twins like to play soccer at about 1:00 AM for hours

Milestones: 3rd trimester

Movement: twins are making their

Symptoms: swelling of the hands, back aches, braxton hicks, and lots of pressure

Food Cravings: milk

What I'm Looking Forward to: feeling comfortable again

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Last belly photo of 2nd trimester......

compared to 16 weeks, my first belly photo....

Photos just dont show the growth nor how much more solid my belly has gotten.  Crazy the growing really starts the 3rd big will I get? :)

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

26 weeks

He has his daddy's toes :)

How Far Along: 26 weeks and 2 days

Size of Baby: Madison (baby A) measured a little less then 2 pounds and Jackson (baby B) measured over 2 pounds

Baby A (Madison): she found her feet :)

Baby B (Jackson):

Weight Gain: 4 pounds (all babies)

Belly: belly gets bigger everynight

Sleep: breathing has been difficult and heartburn...not to mention having to pee every 45 minutes so I get it when I can get it

Milestones: we are pass the point, per books, where they would be able to survive if born today

Movement: these babies are moving all the time and the fun is now hurt, although I love feeling them knowing they are there

Symptoms: I know I am not officially in 3rd trimester till next week but I think I can say with twins, I am in my 3rd trimester, all the horribles of 1st are coming back

Food Cravings: extremely cold APPLE JUICE

Gender: BOY AND GIRL found out July 18, 2011

Names: Madison Lynn and Jackson Thomas

What I'm Looking Forward to: feeling ready for the babies, have a while to go

Dr updates: had high risk apt yesterday and didnt get the best of news. My cervix has started opening at the top. Luckily the length of my cervix has not changed. I go next Monday for a test to determine if I am at high risk of pre term labor and then they will decide on what my next steps are.

Also, Madison placenta fluids are low. They arent sure why and are going to monitor. If you look at the ultrasound pics, you can see the difference in fluid levels. Really concerned about this but Dr said its more just something to watch at this point.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Labor and Delivery Tour

So, yesterday hubby and I did the tour of where are little bundles of joys will enter the world. It is a brand new hospital so everything is brand new and sparkly.  They have no visiting hours, so family can come and go all night. They have maternity suites which are similar to a hotel suite and have flat screens, DVR, fridge, bed for husband and etc.  Very very nice and very excited we are getting to deliver there. patient room

Babies stay in the room with us the whole time, unless they have to go to NICU of course which I am nervous about because they are twins and may came early.  If they go to NICU and because I am having a c-section, it will be 12 hours at the earliest I will get to see them. I am so upset about this.  Luckily, Jason will get to go in within an hour after they get them set up but I dont like I have to wait so long.  I am just going to keep praying we will not have to worry about the NICU. 

Another surprise, even with a c-section, you are on track to be discharged at 48 hours.  I thought with c-section it was longer but hey, less time in the hospital the better. 

So, as you can see we learned allot yesterday.  Made everything so real and so close.  I havent been feeling the greatest this week, I have a very heavy feeling and lots of pressure.  I called my OB and she said since I wasnt having any contractions or fluids, I should be able to wait till my high risk apt on Monday but to take it easy for the rest of the week.  She thinks the babies have just changed positions and have made it more uncomfortable but doesnt feel concerned. However, if I get any heavy fluid or contractions, I am to come to the office right away.  Guess we will see how the rest of the week goes. 

Just for your information.... I AM NOT READY nor want to be on bedrest already. I am hoping the Dr is right and they have just changed positions. I am starting to realize how short my time may be.  We are now setting up appointments with daycares and pediatricians.  Nursery is not even close to being done...just feel like so much to do and not enough time!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Week 23

How Far Along: 23 weeks and 5 days

Size of Baby:  they are both over a pound and about a foot long, most books refer to them as a little baby doll

Picture:  no picture for this week

Weight Gain: had OB apt and I am officially at my start weight, not a pound more

Belly:  slowed down on growing

Sleep: some nights I can fall asleep as soon as I hit my pillow and sleep almost through the ngiht before I have to go pee and then other nights, I will toss and turn and get up and pee about 8 times.  Havent found out how to sleep well everynight and I know it doesnt exist :(

Milestones: now feeling both babies kick, poor Madison placenta was in front of her and she just couldnt kick hard enough but it was scaring me. 

Movement:  wow, my babies are very active and feel them all the time.  My OB said she was glad the high risk Dr was doing my measurements.  haha.

Symptoms:  still heartburn, I have to sleep propt up.  Also starting to feel very heavy in the afternoon from the weight of belly. 

Food Cravings: I am thirsty all the time and nothing seems to quinch the thirst.  No food really....

Gender: BOY AND GIRL found out July 18, 2011 

Names: Madison Lynn and Jackson Thomas

What I'm Looking Forward to: getting nursery completed, husband just finished painting and starting on the cribs.

Dr updates: OB apt went well, belly measured where it should, gained weight since last apt, and babies heartbeats look good. Dont have another apt until Sept 19 with high risk.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

22 weeks

How Far Along: 22 weeks today

Size of Baby: at 21 weeks and 4 days ultrasound, babies weighed 1 pound and few ounces each


Weight Gain: I still have not gained any weight, however, I am officially back at my start weight.

Belly: cant see my feet anymore :(

Sleep: I have not only hard to get comfortable but between coughing and peeing, I pretty much just nap through the night.

Milestones: Jason felt the babies kick at 21 weeks for the first time.

Movement: feel them all the time now, however Jackson allot more but found out at apt its because Madison placenta is in front of her so she has to kick allot harder.

Symptoms: HEARTBURN!!! ugh...its so bad and tums just doesn't do the trick.

Food Cravings: no big cravings right now but much heavier appetite.

Gender: BOY AND GIRL found out July 18, 2011

What I'm Looking Forward to: finishing our nursery and having everything ready

Dr updates: high risk apt last week went really well. Due to babies being IVF babies, they did echogram on each baby. Its crazy how much they can determine on those ultrasound machines. Anyways, both babies hearts looked great and they are both measuring where they need to be. My cervix is still very high and closed, dont have to be seen back for 4 more weeks. :)